Women Who Inspire Me: Annette Jalbert
A Deliberately Designed Life: Annette Jalbert on Healing the Past, Making Comfortable Decisions and Raising the Next Generation of Entrepreneurs
I remember sitting at my table on the second morning of the Trailblazer conference. I had just settled into my seat, with a cup of piping hot peppermint tea, when I first was introduced to Annette. She was brought up on stage where she was gifting her planner, a tool that she uses to support women in designing a deliberate life, to another beautiful Trailblazer who had shared her story the previous day.
When she was on stage, I felt her kindness and generosity. How she cared deeply about helping another woman find time for herself again. As women and as moms, so often we find ourselves balancing what’s expected of us versus what we truly desire and dream about for our lives. We are often battling overscheduling, lack of sleep and forgetting to schedule any sort of me time into our schedules.
Women are on a mission to change that. Where we are questioning, what if it didn’t have to be that way? Where we are modelling to our children a different way forward. Where we are not constantly in a state of go-go-go, but we have the space and breathing room in our daily lives. Where we are not choosing between taking care of our responsibilities or taking care of ourselves. Where working and being there for our kids are not in competition.
This is where I would like to introduce the lovely and amazing Annette. Annette is a counsellor, speaker, mom to three entrepreneurs and an entrepreneur herself who helps women design intentional lives. Her mission is to inspire women to prioritize their dreams, break free from societal norms, and create lives aligned with their values.
As you continue to read, Annette shares her experience with being in the Trailblazer spotlight, her journey into self-development, and the mission that is so close to her heart.
This is Annette’s story.
Can you share a bit about your journey, the path that led you to where you are today?
It's actually quite interesting because, if you had asked me this even a week ago, I might have come up with something different. But I had a bit of an experience this week, where I am thinking to myself, how many other people are going through this too?
I work with one of the other Trailblazers. I'll be very open. I work with Sheetal Story. What was interesting is that in my session post Trailblazer, we were exploring how, in certain situations, what happens in our life today often comes from what we experienced in our childhood.
So one of the things we uncovered was the discomfort I felt going up on stage. I was good to be up there as long as I was serving, as long as I was giving, which is typical of any entrepreneur.
Right, so as long as I was doing that, I was totally ok. But the second, it felt like that spotlight was being turned back around and shining solely on my head to highlight the planner. I no longer looked at it as the entrepreneurial version of myself with a product I believe in. Instead, I thought, “Oh, dear. Oh, shit. To be honest. This is about me,” and being in that vulnerability was uncomfortable.
It was in the aftermath and sitting in the reflection of that session that I actually realized what was actually going on. I wondered, how many times in life are we not fully ourselves? Even when we think that we're being ourselves. How many times, especially as women, are there moments where we are experiencing a past version of ourselves? And how do we begin to recognize when this is happening in the moment?
That was certainly the experience that I had because I pride myself on being yourself first and building a life that supports that, but yet there was a part of me that wanted to hide from that spotlight. When I look back and listen to myself on stage, Selina was talking about the planner. She wasn't talking about me at all, but it was the story I had for myself at that moment.
From that realization, I started to ask myself, “Where else is this happening in my life?”
In asking that question, it showed me that I had a subconscious belief pattern that truthfully dialled all the way back to when I was a young child.
And that belief presented itself on that particular day. It had me question, how is this belief stopping me from wanting to move forward or stopping me from really going all in on business? Because there are still those little pieces of me that haven't yet been able to fully heal or to even actually have the awareness of when I am having that belief influence my actions.
I've said this often in both working with my clients as a counsellor and also in getting my own sessions, is that we never do this work alone.
Right, it's that hand holding and in knowing that there's somebody else on the path with you that makes all the difference. But sometimes, especially as entrepreneurs, because it is a lonely place, a lonely story, sometimes we tend to isolate ourselves.
a) we're not meant to do it all alone, and b) we're not actually successful if we do it alone.
Case in point, in the mastermind meeting with Selina after Trailblazer, she said to me, “I just want to point out to you, how many planners did you sell?” and I said, “I sold 20.” She did the math, and she said, “You made fifteen hundred dollars?!”
I couldn't have done that on my own.
How many times as a woman, how many times as a female entrepreneur, how many times as a solopreneur, do we think we actually have to do it on our own? When we have tons of reasons and tons of examples, that says that’s not the case. I think we just sometimes get so caught up in our heads. You know, thinking, it's my journey, and I have to do this on my own.
Katie Eberman: It’s almost this thinking of, I have to do it all and figure it all out, and it’s all on my shoulders, and if I can’t do it alone, I'm weak. I don't know if it's so much that I'm weak. It's more, I'm showing a vulnerable side by asking for help and sitting in that space is uncomfortable, but necessary to move forward.
Annette Jalbert: I agree, and it's interesting you bring that up, Katie, because I'm always like, I'm vulnerable. I'm real and raw. I'm the girl who's on social media without my hair done, without makeup, because it's just not me, you get what you get sort of thing. In that exact moment in time, I was none of that.
For so many of us, as women, we don't want to be vulnerable because there are still parts and pieces of us that want to present to the world that we've got everything figured out.
In my work with my clients, I like to encourage women to be ok with the idea that you don't have to have it all together. That's why we do this work. It's just so interesting to draw those connections back to self.
That's a message that I can't be alone in needing to hear that for myself, and what I want to be able to share is that when we are sitting in some of those uncomfortable places and asking ourselves, “Do we need to do this by ourselves?”There will be parts of us that want to preserve that idea of, I can do it all by myself.
I always use this analogy that I absolutely love, and maybe this will be helpful to anyone who is reading, where I'm the driver of a school bus, and my school bus has 56 rows because I'm 56 years old.
Every version of me is sitting behind me.
Sometimes one of the versions from the back, that's from 50 years ago, is still coming up and trying to put her hands on the wheel.
Katie Eberman: And you don't know when it's gonna happen, or most times we don't actually realize when it happens.
Annette Jalbert: That's it. We don't realize it. I say this all because I'm the person that's trained to recognize this stuff, but it’s not uncommon for me to not recognize it in myself.
Is there a time or moment where things changed for you and you decided that you needed to make a change in your life?
In 2020, when the outside world slowed down, it gave me permission to slow down too. I took that permission, and it was beautiful and magical in a lot of ways because I was in hustle, grind, go, do, achieve, success, accomplish mode, where I did it all and I did it all exhausted.
So one of the things that I told myself after 2020 was that I wouldn't get back on the ride. You know, like the merry-go-rounds on the playground. Where it would just get spinning, and there was this competition to see who could hang on the longest? That's literally what life felt like before 2020, and then we all got ejected off the merry-go-round. I made a commitment to myself that I wasn't going to get back on the merry-go-round. But you know what? That busyness and pressure creeps back in without you even realizing it.
Katie Eberman: Because it's in the small moments, where you agree to take on this client or I'll just do a project or task because it doesn't take much time. Then all of a sudden you find yourself in a situation where you’re asking yourself, “Wait a minute, I'm back on. How did that happen?”
Annette Jalbert: I literally just said that the other day. I'm like, I think I am happiest when I'm in chaos, and when the world is in chaos. I can say that through working with Sheetal and doing breath work, meditation study, and a lot of work where you are circling back to self. I will tell you, learning about myself has been a massive pivot point in my life. Where I have been digging deep into some of those layers, and not even knowing that some layers even existed.
Last winter, I actually felt peace in my life for the first time. Even after slowing down in 2020/2021, I still had a lot going on with my nervous system.
And in the winter of 2024, I actually got my nervous system to a state of calm. I went and did Joe Dispenza meditation, and it was just absolutely amazing. I remember thinking, “Wow, this is what it feels like to feel at peace.” So now I have a new benchmark that I don't want to go past, and an awareness of it, but, boy, have I ever hit it multiple times already. Those old versions that are riding on the back seats of that school bus are still wanting to come into play. They're still wanting to come and take over that wheel and be able to hijack my bus.
Katie Eberman: I understand that because I'm kind of a person that's like, go, go, go, go. Especially because I have three young kids. I can get a lot done in 10 minutes. I can have the laundry on, answer the phone, and make their lunches. I've been doing that for so many years now, and I'm constantly burning out. I think to myself on a weekly basis, “How do I keep burning out? Something's not right.” But I'm so passionate about my family and about business, and it’s all this ongoing juggle.
What’s something you’ve learned along the way that you wish every woman knew, or a mindset, tool, or practice that’s helped you step into your full potential?
I’m in this stage right now where my husband and I have been successful to this point in our lives, and I would say that this is a bit of a pivot point for us, where we are looking at what the next decade is going to look like. Where we are talking a lot about how do we focus on building wealth now.
I was recently listening to a podcast with Robert Kiyosaki, and he was saying that he was in an Uber, and he offered the driver a copy of his book. And the guy said I don't have time to read it, so if you could just give me what the key points are instead. Robert went on to say, “You missed the point.”
I think the same thing can be applied to building our daily schedule, where we miss the point when we don't take that time to schedule time for ourselves before filling our days with tasks for others. This is especially important in the phase that you are in, where you have young kids, and they take over your schedule. But I think that it is one of the things that we often don't do. I’m definitely guilty of it as well, not as much now, but definitely guilty of it still.
This is why I became so passionate about the planners: to help women build a deliberate life.
When we look at our schedule, we have to ask ourselves, how do you want to build your life?
Let’s take a step back for a moment. When we look at our schedule and start adding things in, what do we put in there first?
Katie Eberman: Kids.
Annette Jalbert: Yes, and then?
Katie Eberman: Usually, your partner, friends, family or other work commitments.
Annette Jalbert: Yes, exactly, all of that. Check, check, check.
Katie Eberman: Usually, I don't put myself on there at all.
Annette Jalbert: That’s exactly the magic piece. It’s what I see in the work that I do and where I have been also. It’s so common that when we are starting to plan out what our week is going to look like, or even what our month is going to look like, that 95 percent of the time, we don't put ourselves on there first.
Katie Eberman: It's true. What you are saying is so relatable. In my own experience, I started implementing the Miracle Morning a little while ago. I don't do it every day, but I take parts of it and bring them into my day.
Especially on the weekends, because before anyone else gets up, I can spend time by myself. I might read, write in my journal and practice meditation or some light stretching before I start to help everyone else for the day. I can really feel the difference between when I start my day connecting with myself, versus when I don’t. Where I am a lot more reactive or grumpy when I skip taking any time for myself at all.
Annette Jalbert: What you just said there is exactly why I created the planner and why I am so passionate about it. I include a practice that I use daily, and what I like to call “bookending” your day - where you start your day with focused time for yourself and end your day with gratitude.
These two practices literally have made such a change in my life. I'm very blessed to be super intentional in building my schedule, where I can get up a little bit earlier if I have clients coming in or say I'm on at the RV park and have to be able to be out there at a certain time. I make sure to spend at least 15 minutes in the morning to come back to myself first before I go out and start my day.
I absolutely fell in love with the idea of “creating before you consume”, where before you bring anything from the outside world in, you create on the inside first. It has literally become foundational in my daily life and has become non-negotiable, along with my practices of bookending my day.
When I am at speaking events or working with clients, I will encourage them to do a 7 day gratitude challenge. Where, for 7 days straight, you practice gratitude.
I love to use a scale rating where I have clients rank on a scale of 1 to 10, answering how did it make me feel by doing it? How was my day?
10 being it was great, everything was wonderful.
And then one being the complete opposite. I didn't notice anything at all. It was still a terrible day, and things just kept happening.
Most people will say that if they didn’t start off at a higher number, at the end of seven days, that number has increased, and that reason alone motivates people to continue with the practice beyond the seven days.
Katie Eberman: I just recently read a book, and it talks about starting your day by writing a gratitude list of 10 things that you're grateful for. I've probably been doing it for about seven days now, and I feel that exact same way, that I want to continue with it and make it part of my daily routine.
Annette Jalbert: Are you open to adding to that daily practice? This is something that I love to do with my clients, and I also do it myself at night before going to sleep, is to list three things that you're grateful for from the day. I believe that if I put that in my mind right before I go to sleep, that it sits in my conscious level and permeates down to my subconscious level, and that's why I get up extremely happy every single morning.
I also have clients who have adapted this practice and do it as a family at dinnertime or after dinner when they are spending time together as a family. Just imagine how powerful it is to be teaching our kids gratitude practices and how to meditate right now?
Katie Eberman: I think about that all the time. About how my kids could really benefit from whatever practice I'm doing, a lot of times I don’t know how to teach them about what I am learning about. I do notice that when I am doing yoga, the kids will come and join me or ask me what I am doing and that when I pick them up from school or am tucking them in at night, I ask them what the best part of their day was.
Annette Jalbert: In doing that, you are modelling to your kids, and modelling is teaching. I spend a lot of time working with teachers on PD days, where I work with them to bring these practices into the classroom.
This is wonderful because we are becoming more open-minded as a society. Where gratitude and meditation practices are becoming an integral part of our daily routine, and being taught to our children, meaning we're not constantly looking for the extra time to do that for ourselves, it’s being automatically included.
What tips do you have for women like myself, who are experiencing burnout trying to do all the things?
I always say that I knew long, long ago I was not wired for “normal”. I knew that I never wanted to be stuck in the 9-to-5.
I knew I wanted to be a counsellor. I went to university and went into being a school counsellor. At the time, my first marriage didn't work, and even though I had no desire to be a teacher, it was a means to the end that would allow me to have the same schedule as my kids.
Truthfully, this version of me now would tell that version, don't bother doing all that. Just go straight into entrepreneurship, but I know that looking back. I had to have that experience to get to where I am now. I needed those lessons to be the version of myself that I am today.
I turn back around on that bus, and I look at every version of me sitting in those seats, and I say thank you all the time.
There came a time when I was to leave the district. I said to my admin at the time, I had a very good relationship with him, “I'm leaving because I'm exhausted. I have a lot on the go and I just can't seem to keep up,” and he asked me “But why are you leaving this?” and I said “because you require me to be here Monday to Friday. I don't want to do this. I don't want to be a Monday to Friday girl. That's not me”, and I was burnt out.
From one burnout queen to another, and I mean, I did it hardcore. I tell everybody it's not diagnosable in Canada, and it doesn't need to be diagnosed. As far as I'm concerned, when you got it, you got it. What I know is that burnout camps on your doorstep and never goes far. Even all these years later, I've been out of the system 10 years already, and she is still knocking every week.
I suggest starting by going back to how you build your schedule and be very intentional about how you spend your time. That's the greatest gift that you could give yourself. Be intentional in giving yourself those small windows to refuel so that you can withstand, you know, as Selina said at Trailblazer, those storms when they present themselves to you.
People will say to me, “Oh, you're always so positive. You're always so happy. You live in gratitude all the time. It must be nice to have everything perfect.” I still feel those storms, but what I have learned is how to have resilience. So that when those storms come up, I’m better equipped to move through them.
Before my deep dive into self-development, I used the analogy of a pinball machine. Where I used to say I was the silver ball in the pinball machine that was paddling me like there was no tomorrow.
Now I know, allow yourself to fall down. It's okay. You don't want to keep taking those hits from life. Just be able to step back from that for a little bit. That lesson is honestly one that I attribute to burning right out. Even with all the work I have done, sometimes still I want to slip into my old patterns. It makes me think of the analogy: the roads with the ruts are easier to drive on than the ones with the bumps.
When women read your story, what do you hope they walk away feeling or believing about themselves?
There’s such power in leaving behind the culture of the hustle and the grind. I don't think we need to break our backs. I don't think that we need to chase. In my experience of doing all the things, I was doing it to keep everybody else comfortable.
It wasn't what I desired.
Two years ago, the question that I was left with was, "Who am I?” And I started my path of self-development. Now I ask women that very same question, of who are you? What do you think I usually hear first?
Katie Eberman: Mom.
Annette Jalbert: Exactly. I hear everybody's roles before anything else. So my invitation to you, Katie, and to the woman who is reading this, ask yourself, who am I?
This is exactly the message that I want out to women, and I want to be able to provide that vehicle for women to be able to move forward and answer that for herself to create a deliberate life.
Katie Eberman: That's how I feel, too, in my mission. In the small part that I'm playing, especially when it comes to my kids. My daughter, she's only three, but I’m always thinking to myself, the world has to be better for you. You have to have more opportunities. I don't want her to choose between going to work or being with her kids, because that's something I've really struggled with since becoming a mom.
Annette Jalbert: You're already creating that. So remind yourself of that when you look at yourself in the mirror. You're breaking that pattern. You're breaking that belief by showing all of your kids exactly how to do something different.
I also want to say one thing to you. Don't ever say in my small part because there's nothing about what you're doing that is small. Be proud. That's a mirror reversed as well.
You know, I used to say my little side gig, my little hustle, my little whatever. And then I'm like, hold on a minute. There's nothing little about this, this is growing, this is working. It’s the snowball effect. Sometimes I wish that the snow would come a little faster because it is taking a long time to build this thing up. But at the same time, I think that it is an honour where you are, and you're making sure that your daughter doesn’t have to live that life because you're showing her something different.
Katie Eberman: Thank you for saying that. I feel that way about my sons, too. Whatever they want to do, they should be able to do it too. I want them to have the choice to be home with their kids, if that’s something that they desire and that feels good for them.
Annette Jalbert: What’s important is that you are taking action, just think about all the people that have done big things in life. Look at the Oprah Winfreys, the Thomas Edisons, the Henry Fords. We only get to see what they actually created that made them big, but we don't know all the parts and pieces that got them there. We are choosing a different path for ourselves, even though there are days where it does feel hard, we're choosing to do something that looks different, that’s not the norm.
My mission is to create a community where women get to decide how they want to live. Where we don't have to put our wants and desires aside anymore, because we've done it for a very long time now. There's still so many aspects in life where we are still fighting for our place.
I believe we can do this through entrepreneurship and female leadership. The more of us that are sitting inside rooms like what Selina has created, the more that we're going to be able to meet that goal. We’re going to be able to mentor and show youth that are coming up behind us, that they don't have to live life like that anymore, and they get to do it sooner than we did.
Here’s how you can connect with Annette:
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